Breaking Up

No matter what type of theology you follow, here is a post to help you know what to say when breaking up with that significant other.

This is quite funny.

Quoting J I Packer

There is no doubt that Evangelicalism today is in a state of perplexity and unsettlement. In such matters as the practice of evangelism, the teaching of holiness, the building up of local church life, the pastor's dealing with souls and the exercise of discipline, there is evidence of widespread dissatisfaction with things as they are and of equally widespread uncertainty as to the road ahead. This is a complex phenomenon, to which many factors have contributed; but, if we go to the root of the matter, we shall find that these perplexities are all ultimately due to our having lost our grip on the biblical gospel. Without realizing it, we have during the past century bartered that gospel for a substitute product which, though it looks similar enough in points of detail, is as a whole a decidedly different thing.
Hence our troubles; for the substitute product does not answer the ends for which the authentic gospel has in past days proved itself so mighty. The new gospel conspicuously fails to produce deep reverence, deep repentance, deep humility, a spirit of worship, a concern for the church. Why? We would suggest that the reason lies in its own character and content. It fails to make men God-centred in their thoughts and God-fearing in their hearts because this is not primarily what it is trying to do.
One way of stating the difference between it and the old gospel is to say that it is too exclusively concerned to be "helpful" to man - to bring peace, comfort, happiness, satisfaction - and too little concerned to glorify God. The old gospel was "helpful", too - more so, indeed, than is the new - but (so to speak) incidentally, for its first concern was always to give glory to God. It was always and essentially a proclamation of Divine sovereignty in mercy and judgment, a summons to bow down and worship the mighty Lord on whom man depends for all good, both in nature and in grace. Its centre of reference was unambiguously God. But in the new gospel the centre of reference is man.
This is just to say that the old gospel was [genuinely] religious in a way that the new gospel is not. Whereas the chief aim of the old was to teach men to worship God, the concern of the new seems limited to making them feel better. The subject of the old gospel was God and His ways with men; the subject of the new is man and the help God gives him. There is a world of difference. The whole perspective and emphasis of gospel preaching has changed.....

Changing a light bulb

How many christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatic: Only 1-Hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal: 10-One to change the bulbs, and 9 to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None-Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None-candles only.

Baptists: At least 15-One to change the bulb, and 3 committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: 3-One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Mormons: 5-One man to change the bulb, and 4 wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, flourescent, 3-way, long life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined-Whether your light bulb is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to share.

Nazarene: 6-One woman to replace the bulb while 5 men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans- None-Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish- What's a light bulb?

Statue of Levi

Levi was sitting at lunch today and he held his cup up and Jace asked him, "are you the Statue of Liberty?" He said, "No, I'm the Statue of Levi."

Moving

We were just about to the end of the five year exam when the Doc left the room to get her assistant to come in and do the dirty work. As we were waiting I mentioned to Levi there was one thing left we had to do and he wasn't going to like it too much. He said, "Do I have to move?" (You have to know he has been having many fears that he has to move lately-we don't know why) I said, "No, and why are you so concerned about moving?" He said, "I think I'm ready. I can move to Janice's and that would be a good start cuz it's not too far away." Needless to say, he found out the final part of his exam wasn't moving and he took his shots like a brave little 5 year old. I told Janice he would be on his way after his arms are all healed up. :o)

My servant

Went to Mister Car Wash yesterday in Stillwater for a fill and fuel after Levi got his 5 year old shots. The place has the best carwash of all and it's cheap! Anyway, it's not the point. The guy comes up to my car and I say, "I'll have a fill and a carwash please." He says, "sure," and goes about his task. Levi pipes up in the back, "hey mom, is he your servant?"

I spy

We were playing "I spy" a top one of the big waterslides in the Dells out the window one morning when Levi said the funniest thing! First of all we went through all the normal things, a Dominoes, a red truck ,a fed ex truck, a subway, etc....When Levi said, "I spy a Perkins!" I looked near and far and couldn't find it. I said, "where?" He pointed to a hill a hundred miles away where there was an American flag. He then said, "Wherever there's an American flag, there's a Perkins!"

Happy birthday Leevs!

Levi is 5 today! He was so excited this morning when I told him, "it's today! You're REAL birthday!" He said, "it is? I'm 5? Like right now? Serious?" I said,"yes!" He stopped, looked very carefully at himself, up and down, felt around, etc......then he said all puzzled looking at me, "I don't feel five."

You Did That For Me....

I love this Sara Groves song. It reminds me of ALL Christ has done for me!!!! Praise Him!

I don't have to cry anymore • I don't have to worry about what's in store • I've walked that road exhausted and poor • I don't have to cry anymore • • And I don't have to know it all • I don't have to be so proud and stand so tall • I climbed that mountain only to fall • I don't have to know it all • • You did that for me • Oh, you did that for me • You wore the chains so I could be free • Yeah, yeah • You did that for me • • And I don't have to be ashamed • Hang my head or shoulder the blame • Wondering if my life's been in vain • I don't have to be ashamed • • Oh, you did that for me • Oh, you did that for me • You wore the chains so I could be free • Yeah, yeah • You did that for me • • Man of sorrows • Well acquainted with grief • Drug down to the city dump • Spread eagle on a cross beam • Propped up like a scarecrow • Nailed like a thief • There for all the world to see • • You wore the chains so I could be free • Yeah, yeah • Oh Lord, you did that for me • Oh Lord, you did that for me, You wore the chains so I could be free • •